Head to Heart

This past Sunday we made the 8 hour drive to North San Pedro, a mountain barrio about 400km from home in Chinandega. Those 8, almost 9 hours made for the longest, most pleasant drive I'd had in a while: the beautiful landscapes, the dirt roads, windows down..  everything completely new, everything exciting, and nothing but nature for miles and miles. This paired with sweet songs of worship, the whole way there- in English, Spanish, tongues..
Upon our arrival in the evening, we attended a church service where we spoke, shared testimonies, led music, and worshipped together. There were no doors to this church just a huge gated archway at the entry, and large open windows along the walls. And that was home for two days, administering medicine, praying for the community, bathing in the river, and sleeping on the warm floor every night, fans spiraling above us. It was there, laying on the hard ground, the  holy ground of that precious church, that something became very clear to me. And its one of those head to heart knowledge things that i cant  explain, because its simply Jesus. Ive been praying for humility and continue to, for my life to reflect John 3:30, to become nothing so Christ can be everything. As i reflect on the hardest times since I've been here, in my most difficult moments, they've all been about me. I've been focusing on me, how I'm doing, how I'm growing, how I'm measuring up, how I'm being seen here. Of course when I take my eyes off of Jesus all I'm going to see is the storm that's surrounding me. And without jesus, without him as my focus, as my center every day, every hour, every second- I know the waves will over take me. They have, and they will, every time I look at myself instead of Jesus. Praise God that this is not about me. Praise God that he is perfect and flawless and good and holy in every situation. And praise God he allows us to walk with him, towards him as changes us little by little, revelation by revelation- more of him less of us. Gosh Praise our sweet and kind father for that. So simple, yet so profound that God could  change my heart simply by the knowledge of it.
We left San Pedro late and decided to stay the night in Rio Blanco at a local Christian radio station, and doing another medical brigade in the church where we slept the next morning. Day 4 of the journey was much like the rest: tiring, hot, exciting, full of people, medicine, soccer, coconuts, oh and the new parrot we bought for Rossy for Valentines day. She is big and her sex is as of now undetermined, so we are calling her Lulu (taken from the name of this kind of parrot in Spanish, which is Lora), indefinitely. As we were packing up the truck and trailer once again, heading to another community that needed medicine instead of heading home, I got the incredible pleasure of introducing Lulu to four precious children who lived down the street, two boys and two girls. I talked with them, and gave the girls the coconut Lulu and I were sharing to feed her themselves, as the boys insisted on testing my theory that Lulu really couldn't bite that hard. As we talked and played with the palm branches and coconuts that scattered the ground around us, I realized the pure joy that was coursing through my veins, that was contagious, starting in the children's eager smiles and (seeping) right into my heart. I see Jesus so clearly in children. Something about kids, about their reckless joy and love and excitement for life. They absolutely radiate the joy and love that I'm sure embody the character of my friend and my savior Jesus Christ. Watching them laugh and play and embrace me with open arms, I couldn't help but let my heart swell with everything these children were bringing to me, and realize that I have nothing to give them that they haven't given me already.  I look at them, and i see Jesus.  I look at their dirty feet and worn clothes and welcoming smiles, and want to give them everything. And I know, deep in the core of my being, all I have is Jesus. I know all they need- all I need- is Jesus. And he's everything.
As we drive the dark and winding dirt roads, continuing on our never-ending adventure, my heart is full once again; in this truck, filled with pillows, my fellow Nicaraguan adventurers, and their sweet songs of praise- to the Father, to the Son Jesus Christ, who can be and has been and always will be everything for his people now and forever